The Scientific Nature of the Whammy

5,249 notes

Anonymous asked: Shouldn't Steve be sterile too, really? Otherwise, what's the reason for why there's not an army of US government created Captain America kids running around? You'd think that'd be the next logical step when they realized they couldn't recreate the serum...

jchelseaw:

rageprufrock:

misspryss:

actualmenacebuckybarnes:

Well, since the serum is an enhancement, it’s unlikely to be passed through genetics (the doctors probably tested this, somehow, haha). Steve’s kids are more likely to inherit his asthma and weak stature. 

OH MY GOD THO

A SINISTER GOVT EXPERIMENT TO CREATE AN ARMY OF TINY CAPTAIN AMERICAS

STEVE FINDS OUT ABOUT IT AT SOME POINT

AND IT’S BASICALLY ELEVEN TOW-HEADED, ASTHMATIC, ALLERGIC, IMMUNO-COMPROMISED LITTLE BEANPOLES WITH BAD ATTITUDES

AGES 8-12

SOCKED AWAY SOMEWHERE

LIKE IN A WAREHOUSE OR WHATEVER

WITH A COUPLE OF OVERWHELMED INTERNS BABYSITTING THEM

BECAUSE THE RESEARCHERS HAD ALL THEIR FUNDING TAKEN AWAY WHEN CAPTAIN AMERICA’S SECRET UBERMENCH CLONES TURNED OUT TO BE A BUNCH OF WEAKLINGS

AND NOBODY KNOWS WHAT TO DO WITH THIS GAGGLE OF KIDS (WHO ARE SHRILL AND UNMANAGEABLE AND WHEEZE A LOT)

EXCEPT MAKE SURE THEY GET ADEQUATE MEDICAL CARE AND REGULAR MEALS

AND REGRET THEIR IN RETROSPECT VERY OBVIOUS ERRORS

AND HOPE STEVE DOESN’T FIND OUT

WHICH OF COURSE HE DOES

BACK AT THE TOWER

EVERYONE’S INHALERS KEEP GETTING MIXED UP

THERE ARE COLORED PENCILS EVERYWHERE

A FISTFIGHT ABOUT THE NATURE OF JUSTICE ENSUES BETWEEN THE 9 YEAR OLD ONE AND ONE OF THE 11 YEAR OLDS

AND BUCKY

IS

ON

CLOUD

9

This. Is. My. Fetish.

Hey so can I write this? Whoever came up with the idea, can I please write it for you? Please? PLEASE?!

Have at! I’m going to take a stab at it myself eventually but god knows at the rate I’m going this thing won’t see the light of day for months, if ever. And I feel like there cannot be too many stories about Steve’s army of tiny, pugnacious, sneezing clones.

Filed under captain america clones fanfic

60,022 notes

stele3:

nikolasdraperivey:

CINEMATIC MILES MORALES COSPLAY

Yo! My name is Nikolas A. Draper-Ivey…This is cosplay as Cinematic Miles Morales: The Ultimate Spider Man. This suit was made by 
Jesse Covington ( Writer and Costume Designer) and sewn by Sasha Williams ( Fashion Major graduate). Photos were taken by Pierre BL Brevard I specifically would like to thank Marvel Comics Artist Sara Pichelli for designing this character. I’m also very excited to see Olivier Coipel's work on Spider-Verse!

(Full shoot will be shot in New York itself just in time for NYCC)

The suit is incredible.

Filed under spiderman cosplay

5,249 notes

Anonymous asked: Shouldn't Steve be sterile too, really? Otherwise, what's the reason for why there's not an army of US government created Captain America kids running around? You'd think that'd be the next logical step when they realized they couldn't recreate the serum...

stele3:

samknitchester:

stele3:

solarcat:

misspryss:

actualmenacebuckybarnes:

Well, since the serum is an enhancement, it’s unlikely to be passed through genetics (the doctors probably tested this, somehow, haha). Steve’s kids are more likely to inherit his asthma and weak stature. 

OH MY GOD THO

A SINISTER GOVT EXPERIMENT TO CREATE AN ARMY OF TINY CAPTAIN AMERICAS

STEVE FINDS OUT ABOUT IT AT SOME POINT

AND IT’S BASICALLY ELEVEN TOW-HEADED, ASTHMATIC, ALLERGIC, IMMUNO-COMPROMISED LITTLE BEANPOLES WITH BAD ATTITUDES

AGES 8-12

SOCKED AWAY SOMEWHERE

LIKE IN A WAREHOUSE OR WHATEVER

WITH A COUPLE OF OVERWHELMED INTERNS BABYSITTING THEM

BECAUSE THE RESEARCHERS HAD ALL THEIR FUNDING TAKEN AWAY WHEN CAPTAIN AMERICA’S SECRET UBERMENCH CLONES TURNED OUT TO BE A BUNCH OF WEAKLINGS

AND NOBODY KNOWS WHAT TO DO WITH THIS GAGGLE OF KIDS (WHO ARE SHRILL AND UNMANAGEABLE AND WHEEZE A LOT)

EXCEPT MAKE SURE THEY GET ADEQUATE MEDICAL CARE AND REGULAR MEALS

AND REGRET THEIR IN RETROSPECT VERY OBVIOUS ERRORS

AND HOPE STEVE DOESN’T FIND OUT

WHICH OF COURSE HE DOES

BACK AT THE TOWER

EVERYONE’S INHALERS KEEP GETTING MIXED UP

THERE ARE COLORED PENCILS EVERYWHERE

A FISTFIGHT ABOUT THE NATURE OF JUSTICE ENSUES BETWEEN THE 9 YEAR OLD ONE AND ONE OF THE 11 YEAR OLDS

AND BUCKY

IS

ON

CLOUD

9

SOMEONE WRITE THIS RIGHT THE FUCK NOW OKAY.

Oh man. Bucky’s sloooooooow ass recovery—he’s still very standoffish and disappears for weeks that he refuses to tell anyone about but it’s probably to kill HYDRA agents—runs headlong into the discovery of eleven little Steves. Like, he comes back to the Tower with blood under his fingernails and a swath of smoldering destruction behind him, and the first thing he encounters is one of the 8yo Steves, who eyes him suspiciously even as he fiddles with his hearing aids.

Bucky stares back. This is a hallucination. It has to be.

By the time Steve finds Kevin—they are, in order of age, Aaron, Brad, Christopher, Darren, Ethan, Flynn, Galen, Hunter, Ian, Jenny (who has fiercely informed all who will listen that she is not a boy, to the equally-fierce support of her many siblings, who rarely agree about anything except this), and Kevin—Bucky is sitting cross-legged on the floor next to him. Kevin has his head tilted towards Bucky, who is carefully and delicately re-situating Kevin’s hearing aid with fingers that still have blood under the nails.

and they used peggy’s dna too

!!! The actual samples were taken back in 1940 (all of the SSR contributed, it was standard practice and All For the War Effort) and then they just kinda sat on ice (blah blah viability of frozen reproductive material blah blah pssh) until some HYDRA-in-SHIELD scientists got their hands on it and decided to give it the old college try.

A passel of Steves, raised in secret by HYDRA. Those kids are gonna be SO. MESSED. UP. They’re an insular group: the three 12yos—Aaron, Brad, and Chris—act as pseudo-parental units, protecting the others viciously. Especially little Jenny, who was viewed as an anomaly by the scientists and thus studied the most extensively. They have little codewords and secret languages. Outsiders and adults are generally viewed with hostility.

Bucky relates to them better than anyone, really. Brad actually remembers meeting him, once: they’d been in the same lab and Bucky had caught a glimpse of him. What followed was an insane amount of violence as The Winter Soldier reacted to seeing that face looking scared and hurt. He’d tried to grab Brad and make a run for it, but Brad had fought to stay, unwilling to leave the others.

In the here and now, Bucky stares at Brad. “I don’t remember that. I don’t—they took it.”

Brad presses his lips together and shrugs his skinny shoulders, focused on coloring. His pictures are usually an aimless mash. He has Steve’s color-blindness; most of them do, though the scientists had managed to “correct” that in the younger kids.

Oh MAN yes. 

Filed under Braaaaaad captain america the winter soldier fanfic

5,249 notes

Anonymous asked: Shouldn't Steve be sterile too, really? Otherwise, what's the reason for why there's not an army of US government created Captain America kids running around? You'd think that'd be the next logical step when they realized they couldn't recreate the serum...

cassandrexx:

cactusspatz:

cassandrexx:

rageprufrock:

misspryss:

actualmenacebuckybarnes:

Well, since the serum is an enhancement, it’s unlikely to be passed through genetics (the doctors probably tested this, somehow, haha). Steve’s kids are more likely to inherit his asthma and weak stature. 

OH MY GOD THO

A SINISTER GOVT EXPERIMENT TO CREATE AN ARMY OF TINY CAPTAIN AMERICAS

STEVE FINDS OUT ABOUT IT AT SOME POINT

AND IT’S BASICALLY ELEVEN TOW-HEADED, ASTHMATIC, ALLERGIC, IMMUNO-COMPROMISED LITTLE BEANPOLES WITH BAD ATTITUDES

AGES 8-12

SOCKED AWAY SOMEWHERE

LIKE IN A WAREHOUSE OR WHATEVER

WITH A COUPLE OF OVERWHELMED INTERNS BABYSITTING THEM

BECAUSE THE RESEARCHERS HAD ALL THEIR FUNDING TAKEN AWAY WHEN CAPTAIN AMERICA’S SECRET UBERMENCH CLONES TURNED OUT TO BE A BUNCH OF WEAKLINGS

AND NOBODY KNOWS WHAT TO DO WITH THIS GAGGLE OF KIDS (WHO ARE SHRILL AND UNMANAGEABLE AND WHEEZE A LOT)

EXCEPT MAKE SURE THEY GET ADEQUATE MEDICAL CARE AND REGULAR MEALS

AND REGRET THEIR IN RETROSPECT VERY OBVIOUS ERRORS

AND HOPE STEVE DOESN’T FIND OUT

WHICH OF COURSE HE DOES

BACK AT THE TOWER

EVERYONE’S INHALERS KEEP GETTING MIXED UP

THERE ARE COLORED PENCILS EVERYWHERE

A FISTFIGHT ABOUT THE NATURE OF JUSTICE ENSUES BETWEEN THE 9 YEAR OLD ONE AND ONE OF THE 11 YEAR OLDS

AND BUCKY

IS

ON

CLOUD

9

This. Is. My. Fetish.

Oh my God, though. Imagine the Winter Soldier, going through classified old SHIELD projects in search of more HYDRA targets to destroy, coming across that Warehouse. This warehouse full of little kids who look like… look like… The man on the bridge, he thinks, but that’s nonsense; the man on the bridge had been 200 pounds of deadly muscle, nothing at all like these skinny little kids with their fragile bones.

And then an intern spots him and all hell breaks loose, kids and handlers fleeing, leaving behind one little blonde boy who’s wheezing too hard to run.

The Winter Soldier stares, motionless. The boy looks back at him, scared and wheezing but too stubborn to cry; and suddenly the Winter Soldier knows what to do.

"I’m Bucky," he says, kneeling down in front of the boy. "Where’s your inhaler, kid?"

Uh, wait, I’m confused. Where are the other 20,000 words of this? *shakes post until more fic falls out*

BUT OMG BUCKY. Does he carefully make sure this boy gets somewhere safe and then go after all the others, because clearly anyone who would abandon a kid in his presence doesn’t deserve to be taking care of any children, ever?

The soldier reaches out with one hand – slowly, carefully, don’t startle him – and suddenly the boy grabs his wrist and yanks, rams his bony shoulder into the soldier’s side, heaves. It’s a Judo throw, all leverage and momentum; the kind that, if executed well, will allow a sixty pound boy to put a grown man on his back.

The boy executes it perfectly, but the main reason it works is that the soldier wasn’t expecting it at all. He hits the floor hard, lies stunned for a moment, the air knocked out of him. The boy scrambles on top of him, reaches for the gun at his side –

There’s a limit to how much the Winter Soldier can let himself be surprised, even by a nine year old boy. He closes the metal hand around the boy’s wrist – gently, careful, don’t hurt him, don’t hurt him – and the boy goes still, wide-eyed, terrified, his breath rasping loudly in the quiet.

"Codename Winter Soldier. Authorization 84629054FT67," the soldier says, on a hunch, and the boy relaxes all at once, recognizing the code. His breathing’s still getting worse, though, the exertion catching up with him. The soldier braces him, helps him into a half-remembered position – kneeling upright, hands braced on thighs, letting the stomach muscles help with the exhausting work of breathing. "Where’s your inhaler?" he says again.

"Table," the boy croaks.

Inhalers have changed a lot since… since… When would he have had cause to handle an inhaler? The soldier shakes his head, dazed. Thankfully the boy seems to know what to do, sucking in big lungfuls of medicine with the air of a well-practiced ritual, and his breathing’s already getting easier.

"What’s your name?" The soldier asks quietly.

"Alex, sir. Alexandra 483047." The soldier blinks. Alexandra? But no, he can see it now; despite the shorn hair and the boyish clothes, Alex has a girl’s fine-boned facial structure. She’s looking at the soldier with wide eyes, a little awed. "Are you really the Winter Soldier?"

"Yes." The soldier says. He looks at the girl, her watchful, alert body language, her easy, balanced movements. "Hydra trained you."

"Yes, sir. They used to train us real hard, and Trainer said I was the best of all the girls!" Alex says proudly. But then she looks down and her voice gets small and quiet. "But then we didn’t grow up big like they thought we would, and me and Jamie got the asthma, and Mary had pneum - um - pneumonia again, so they said they were going to eliminate us. But Uncle Pierce said, we don’t eliminate kids, and it would be a terrible waste, and we could still grow up to be loyal soldiers of Hydra!"

She ticks those last three points off on her fingers, clearly quoting, and Bucky gets the impression the words have been carefully stored away and rehearsed, repeated so often their comfort has worn thin. And then the girl suddenly flinches, cowering away. “Are you here to eliminate me?”

Oh dude, this is AWESOME.

Filed under sometimes i hate tumblr but sometimes i really love it tonight i love it captain america the winter soldier fanfic the marketplace of ideas

0 notes

tazigo asked: Is there any way you could be persuaded to write more of this: [your tumblr] post/95597176789/shouldnt-steve-be-sterile-too-really-otherwise ? Or nominate someone else to? I'd really really love to read it ^_^

Hey! Thanks so much for this nice note!

I think I’m going to take a stab at it, yeah - I’m clearing out some deadlines right now but I should be writing fic again in a few weeks, and then it’s going to be a parade of indignant ten-year-old Steve clones with sinus infections and Big Plans for Doing Good, What Do You Mean It’s Bedtime, Bucky, This Is Important, you mark my words. 

That said, anyone else who wants to dive into this concept should feel free - I’d love to see anything that comes out of it. 

249 notes

no press, not ever

feanorinleatherpants:

zetsubonna:

"So, you two are dating. That’s new, isn’t it?"

Captain America and Bucky Barnes exchange a long, unsmiling look. Falcon, off camera, pinches the bridge of his nose.

"We’re married," Barnes says, flat and deadpan. "We’ve been married since July."

"Birthday present," Captain America says, smiling tightly. "We’ve been together since ‘39."

"Give or take," Barnes says, shrugging.

"Boyfriend, though. The boyfriend’s new," Captain America smiles, slow and dangerous, and Falcon cringes, closing his eyes and counting backwards from a hundred.

"We had a girlfriend before," Barnes adds, with a smile that looks like he practices it while he cleans his rifle.

"She was my girl,” Captain America says, and Barnes shrugs.

The interviewer is clearly struggling. “I see. So- um. Your- your boyfriend, does he- I mean, you two-“

"He won’t move in with us," Captain America says, blue eyes wide and innocent.

"We’re horrible to live with," Barnes says, smirking, leaning back in his chair. "Coffee cups everywhere. Cigarettes on the fire escape. Paint on the carpet."

"Cats," Captain America says pointedly. "Three Maine Coon tabbies. Hair on everything."

"Ah! The- the cats. They’re yours, aren’t-"

"They’re mine," Barnes corrects. "They tolerate Rogers. They’re my cats.”

"His Instagram is public," Captain America points out. "Those really are his pictures. Those cats are his children."

"Winter’s Children," Barnes says mysteriously, staring off into the distance.

 Captain America elbows him in the ribs.

"Right, so, um. We have another Avenger with us today, um, your colleague-"

Boyfriend,” Barnes and Captain America correct automatically.

The studio is dead silent. Falcon sighs as he walks out, goes to sit beside Barnes, who immediately moves so he’s forced to sit between them. Barnes and Captain America instantly go from dangerously tight to loose-limbed and bedroom eyed. Falcon shakes his head.

"Can’t take these two anywhere. Just ask me everything, they’ll troll you all day. Jerks."

WINTER’S CHILDREN.  I am dying.

Filed under 100% on board with this forever captain america the winter soldier sam wilson

34 notes

new fic: halfway between the gutter and the stars

ladyofthelog:

halfway between the gutter and the stars (2235 words) by verity
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Jane Foster/Thor, Darcy Lewis & Thor, Thor & Avengers Team
Characters: Thor (Marvel), Jane Foster (Marvel), Darcy Lewis, Avengers Team (MCU), Neil deGrasse Tyson, George Takei
Additional Tags: Friendship, Fame, Social Media, Established Relationship, Astronomy, Thor does it for the Vine
Series: Part 4 of mixtape
Summary:

Thor pulls his phone out of his pocket and lifts it above them to capture a picture of the moment, their hair lit by the sun, Jane’s soft smile next to his beaming grin. The Rise filter suits the image perfectly. “I shall title this ‘THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE,’” Thor says, typing carefully on the touchscreen. “With the small image of your planet, flanked by sparkling stars.”

"Well, we abandoned a geocentric model of the galaxy hundreds of years ago," says Jane.

“‘THE CENTER OF MY UNIVERSE,’” Thor says. He amends his caption and selects the options to crosspost from Instagram to Twitter and Facebook.

special thanks to invaderxan (of the excellent blog Supernova Condensate) for general guidance about HOW DO ASTROPHYSICS +  ACADEME. :D

This story made me feel really happy in that bittersweet way where you know that melancholy is what makes happiness possible in the first place. I love it.

(via ladyofthelog)

Filed under thor avengers fanfic